Dateline: Last February, Corbin, KY

I had to go back in the vault for this one. Kentucky, in my humble opinion, is known for three things: Horses, whiskey and bad cell phone service. (Honorable Mention: Kentucky basketball) I made my first foray into the Commonwealth last February to work with a new distributor. Seeing as I had driven through KY many times on my way to Knoxville I assumed I would get to Corbin without incident. Well, was I ever wrong. First off--it snowed...a lot. Then my GPS decided to defy logic and take me down every dirt country road and back channel in the state. A 3 hour drive turned into a 4-1/2 nightmare. No problem though. I'll just get to my hotel, check in and grab a six pack to calm my nerves. A great idea in theory, but Corbin, KY sits in a dry county. Asking me to go a night in a hotel without booze would be like asking a dog to sit next to a piece of raw meet for a month without licking it. This is a roundabout way of saying it is virtually impossible. However, I persevered and stuck to Diet Cokes for the evening. The next day after I had finished my calls, I was determined to procure some alcohol. Therefore I stared driving north. I figured the closer I got to Lexington to more my chances increased of finding a booze store. Once again, I was wrong. After driving nearly 40 miles north I found that every county surrounding Corbin adopting its mantra of being alcohol free. When I finally decided to give up at the BP of exit 67 I finally asked the attendant, "Seriously, where in the hell can I find a cold beer?" "Tennessee" she responded and went right back to scratching lottery tickets. As I turned around to my return to my car defeated I noticed a young boy, no older than 10 playing video poker sitting next to his mother, who happened to be sucking on a menthol 120. Mind you it was 2pm on a Tuesday. I returned to the nice gas station attendant and said, "Wait a second. I can't get a six pack of O'Douls in this state, but Rain Man and Mother of The Year over there can blow their food stamps on Nintendo before the end of business day?" You would have thought I asked her to write out the Pythagorean Theorem she looked so confused. Moral of the Story: If ever traveling through the Cumberland Gap, always bring your own booze.